Such a Deal!

My friends and I are having ourselves a BFLYS (Big Fat Lesbian Yard Sale) in a couple of weeks. I’ll be liquidating the last of my hand-made tie-dye at clearance prices. Everything is priced to go.

Several years ago (in the deepest part of the recession) Kathleen and I tried our hands at making a small (in this case tiny) business go and make a profit. We were in the business of making and selling tie-dye t-shirts, tablecloths, scarfs and bandanas. The name of our business was Serendipity One, Retro Textile Designs, and all our products were hand-dyed and originally designed. Kathleen and I sold our wares at a county park’s flea market in an ice skating rink. The 1st year’s sales were encouraging, and we almost broke even.

I wrote the following promotion piece for Serendipity One’s Facebook page (which is still up and has photos of the t-shirt’s designs and colors) after our first day selling the t-shirts.

Why I Tie-Dye…

About a year ago, I went to my favorite arts and crafts store. This store is like a candy store for me. So many possibilities only limited by imagination and inspiration. I wandered the aisles and found myself in the blank white t-shirt and fabric dying aisle. I have never considered myself a crafter. I have always had loftier ambitions. I mean I’m an abstract expressionist painter. I’ve shown, for god sakes! But I found myself drawn to the tie-dye kit. “Oh, I can play at being a hippie,” something I was never very good at due to my bourgeoisie pretensions. I bought the kit, telling myself that I needed something to do with all my time since I was recently unemployed.

Well, I had a blast! I bought a handful of shirts and did tie-dye. A few of my creations even got compliments from a professional artist friend. My mother in LA was completely baffled by my new venture. “What about your painting?” Well, I painted, and then I fit in the tie-dye. I wore the t-shirts every day and everywhere. Soon I was buying t-shirts wholesale and dye from Dharma Trading Company. I was in production mode. I even got my girlfriend into making them. We bonded over tie-dye, and I even quit my 3 pack a day smoking habit—a miracle!

Soon all the shirts were creating a storage problem. So I bought bins and then more bins. I sold a few but I mostly sought encouragement by giving the t-shirts as gifts to friends. Much to my surprise, my friends raved about them. Quite frankly, I didn’t quite see what they saw. But doing the tie-dye was keeping me off the cigarettes, and I was grateful for the distraction.

Next, my friends began requesting a fall line, with darker colors and long sleeves. So why not, I was into this thing that had overtaken my life and kept me off the dreaded nicotine. I changed my dying methods and voila—a fall line. I sold a few more.

Meanwhile my part-time contract job was finishing up, and I decided that with little prospect of finding another job during this severe recession, I’d go into the tie-dye business. I’d start out with t-shirts and do custom orders for big jobs like tablecloths and bedspreads. So I took $200 out of my checking account and bought a $100 worth of t-shirts and another $100 worth of dye. My plan was to do a summer line of 40 shirts, all of which would be hand dyed.

I tie-dyed shirt after shirt. Slowly I built up my numbers. After approximately 30 new shirts, I mixed them into my inventory from the past year. I was ready to debut. Now I needed to find a location. I’m well aware that it’s all about “location, location, location” when it comes to business. But the arts and crafts exhibitor world is like a food chain; the better ones cost more in entry fees and are juried while the less desirable ones are cheaper but with questionable returns. So with the sage advice of my girlfriend, I decided to start small and hope to grow—I chose an upscale flea market.

Last Saturday we packed up the car and left at 6:45am for the Flea Market in the Park. The location was a covered outdoor skating rink in a county park. We had about 25 vendors ranging from the hat lady to the cake lady. (There were plenty of people doing the typical yard sale thing too.)

My girlfriend and I made sales well beyond the cost of the entrance fee. We felt like a success!

Well, we probably sold over 200 handmade t-shirts over the course of two years. I loved doing tie-dye but just couldn’t afford to keep putting money into the business. You know how it is… cash flow problems. But I have no regrets. I had the time of my life.

Now I need to move about 50-75 of the leftover t-shirts. I hope to sell them at The Big Fat Lesbian Yard Sale. Serendipity One’s t-shirts that sold for $15 will now be marked down to just $3. Where else can you get a cool looking t-shirt for $3 bucks? Such a deal, I’d say.

So if you’re in the DC area and on the listservs, keep an eye out for The Big Fat Lesbian Yard Sale. Details will be forthcoming.

The Line-Up

Guess where I am during the evening commute? I pick up my dearest at the Metro Kiss n Ride. It's really a happening place. I pull up and line up behind the other cars. We're all waiting for someone to emerge from the Metro's exit and get into their car. I often come early, long before Kathleen arrives. (So that I'll get a good place in the line-up and hopefully, move up to the front by the time Kathleen's train comes.)

At the Kiss n Ride I've got time on my hands. So I listen to the radio and drink a soda. Often that amuses me. But sometimes, I'll admit it, I people-watch. Lately I've been playing a game which I call "Can you match the car with the passenger?" or another one which is "Who goes with their bumper stickers?".

In my neighborhood almost everyone has bumper stickers and/or vanity plates. My neighbors aren't shy about advertising their political views, spiritual beliefs or preferences in restaurants. Some people are an easy match-up with their bumper stickers, and other people you would never guess so.

We do the pet bumper sticker, as you might guess. Since we're cat ladies, it all comes down for us to a short and pithy "MEOW."

In My Movie

You know how every town and industry has its own lingo? Well, I grew up in LA and went to UCLA. So as you might guess, I was surrounded by movies and their magic from the time I’d watch black and white movie classics with my mother as a pre-teen to now when I pick up another Netflix movie from the postbox.

When I was growing up movies were my portal to the outside world since I was stuck in conventional suburbia (and just hating it). But I didn’t just watch movies. No, I imagined movies or more precisely my future life as a movie. In Hollywood lingo, this is called imagining your own personal movie.

I guess you could say I have an active imagination. But ever since I left home at 18, I’ve been living out my imagination, whether it was horseback riding on the beach in Baja, Mexico or when I was working in Washington, DC for a progressive professional association that was just a short walk away from the US Capitol buildings.

It seems like life itself needs to be imagined and then willed into being. I know this is a Hollywood philosophy and from people who have more imagination than common sense. But there’s just something attractive and thrilling about being “in your own movie.”

So the next time you pop in a DVD into the recorder, hit the pause button and imagine what’s going on “in your movie” a year from now. You’ll probably be surprised!

It’s CHAOS

That’s right! Our house is in a state of CHAOS (Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome). Just saying that our house is in a state of disarray or just needs a little tidying up would be disrespectful to the creative state of upheaval our house has become.

Of course, my partner and I both have issues about this CHAOS. We both want a tidy and clean house, but we just don’t seem able to execute the chores to make it so. So what do we do?

We buy books about housekeeping (My partner even reads them!). We also try “take back your house” programs (with some success until we’re overcome with some additional stressor that derails us for a while). Or we do the sure fire method: invite people over to our house for a get-together or a party. (Now it’s necessary that you actually care about what your invitees think about you; otherwise this motivational technique fails miserably.)

Still, after the party, the read book, or the Internet housekeeping program, our house de-evolves into another creative mess. At best our cleaning and tidying up rotates like the lunar cycle. Now, it only takes 28 days for it to become a full mess again.

But things are getting better. Both my partner and I are committed to overcoming the CHAOS somehow or someway. Because, you know, we’re really not messy people.

The Change

I guess you could say that both my partner and I are going through “The Change." It's subtle in many ways. There's of course, the forgetfulness or short-term memory loss. There are also the hot flashes or the "warm flashes", as Kathleen puts it. Oh, yeah, then there's the icky night sweats too. And what about all that weight gain and how it's next to impossible to lose twenty pounds?

Definitely not fun! But for all the hormonal fluctuations “The Change” puts us through, it has one noticeable benefit --- improvements in self-confidence.

Nowadays, I am confident that I'm the standard of what's normal. Basically, if there's a problem, it's not me it's them. Compare that to my insecure and angst-ridden twenties and you wouldn't believe I was the same person. Now all that increased testosterone floating through my system is no doubt contributing to this new edgier self. I believe in myself as only a medieval warrior does when storming a castle’s walls. And when driving, I always have the right-of-way.

But for all the changes, it's also nice to feel at ease with myself. Sure we all don't look or feel as sexy as we did 30 years ago, but I'd gladly give up all the accompanying drama that went with being young, beautiful and available. But then again, that's just me!

Lately, I’ve even noticed that young people defer a little to me and Kathleen. And I wonder how we ever got old enough for that. But the scary thing is now our generation is running the world. The problem is there's no one better to run it. It's just us guys...hot flashes and all...

Fresh Air

At 50 years of age, I often find myself looking backwards and wondering how things might have turned out if I had turned left versus right at crucial moments during my life. Of course, I’ll never know what would have happened, but it’s an amusing pastime.

Most often I’m intrigued about how my life would have progressed if I had chosen a different occupation. I ended up in psychology research, but my heart was really into journalism and social work. There just doesn’t seem to be enough productive years in a lifetime to do two or maybe three careers. And getting the necessary education, whether that be a master’s or even just a bachelor’s, has become very expensive for one career let alone getting the training for a second or “encore” career. Somehow making a career switch for the sake of love and happiness just isn’t so feasible in these difficult economic times.

So what do you do if you need some fresh air in your life? If you can’t change jobs, you can change your recreational activities or volunteer at your local zoo, school or hospital. You’ll meet new people who are doing things that are new to you. You’ll be refreshed, and you’ll probably make friends too.

For the most part, retirement gives one “refreshing” opportunities to do things close to one’s heart. You’ll be amazed at how many things or ideas interest you when the stress and strain of working drops away from your life.

I may not have another paying job, but my interests and hobbies are taking me on exciting adventures whether it’s “chatting” on email listservs or blogging to a community dear to my heart. I sorta get to be the social worker/journalist I always wanted to be. You see, I’m a volunteer now. And you know, in a way, it’s a whole lot easier when you don’t get paid.

Ah…Let’s Go Shopping, Dear!

You know the saying that when “the going gets tough, the tough get going.” Well, my partner and I have a different take on it: We go shopping. Now we did this a lot more ten years ago before the economy went south and we hit our 50’s with its mounting pressures to save for retirement. But lately, it’s getting so tough that maybe we might put off saving a bit for retirement and indulge in some immediate gratification.

Nowadays shopping is so easy. The stores just about grab you through the Internet and barrage you with mailed catalogues. You know how it goes: hard to make the money and so easy to spend it (and so fast too). But now we’re all seeing the virtues of frugality and demonizing gross consumerism. I’ve tightened my belt too. I just don’t look anymore. It’s like giving up chocolate or wine. After a while you only faintly and intellectually miss it like a fading memory of good times. Oh well.

I just wish that I had appreciated my shopping vice more when I practiced it years ago. At the time, the shopping sprees were all part of the whirlwind as we all floated along on a false sense of prosperity. But the Great Recession has sobered me up; I too have lowered my expectations, or my standards, as we all come to grips with the “new normal” economy.

So now instead of “going shopping”, I attempt to create things that I can sell. Actually, Kathleen and I play around with book ideas, story ideas or just about anything you can do with a computer and two minds. Who knows, maybe an idea will pan out and bring in some extra cash. If not, we’ll have some fun at being creative. Heck, it sure beats TV.

Calamity Du Jour

“Well, these are our specials: We have an earthquake on Tuesday and a hurricane on Saturday. Not to be out-done by Vermont's flooding, the next week we have our own flooding after three days of torrential rains. And then, our grand special is the "credible but unconfirmed" terrorist threat for the 10th anniversary of 9/11. All specials come with all-you-can-eat media hype and a souvenir flashlight for any emergency situation."

Our "specials" in DC, or as I like to call it "ground zero", can really work one's nerves. If the disaster isn't political, it's natural. Or at least it is lately. And then, we're just blessed with the entire country's scorn. If the country just knew how hard some of the country's best minds were at work in DC, maybe the country’s expectations would be on a human scale and not that of a Hollywood movie. But everyone expects magic while no one understands how it works.

I just hope that tomorrow's “specials” are side dishes and not dinner entrees because DC needs to go on a calamity diet.

F-A-T-I-G-U-E

We are all knee-deep into the second week of the US Open (Tennis), and I'm starting to experience Tennis F-A-T-I-G-U-E. It's a condition brought on by prolonged exposure to endless tennis matches, often during a Grand Slam Tennis Tournament. I've been watching tennis for many days now---all day, every day and most of the night. And when Tennis Channel dropped out, I picked up my laptop and started live streaming matches. You could say I'm into the Open.

And I'm only on Day 8. We've got a few more days to go. Guess I'm just going to have to take a break from my obsessional behavior. So I'll miss some great tennis, some historic tie-breaks or stupendous sets. It’s just too bad for me. Anyway, everything is starting to all look alike to me. And, I'm starting to get to know the players too well. When I start making comments about their clothes more than their last play, I know I'm burning out.

So what do I do? Do my errands? Is that enough of a distraction? For one thing, we'll have to put a moratorium on all talk about tennis. Guess the car rides will be quiet. Well, maybe it's on the car radio...it isn't. No way around it---I'm just going to have to go through tennis withdrawal for an hour or two.

BTW do you know of anything else going on in the world today?