Vibes Change

You know, your whole vibe changes after fifty. Now I'm into a calm, peaceful and just generally relaxed kind of energy. I often feel like a cool, cloudless and blue sky on a pleasant early October day. Just a little crisp but not in the least bit cold.

Compare that to pre-fifty. I was passionate in and out of bed. I was intense like a crimson bed of coals. And I was ambitious. I would let little or nothing obstruct my will. But I was also anxious and filled with angst. I was all charged up and ready to go, but I still worried about making the right choices.

Well, I charged ahead and not too carefully, I might add. So as you can no doubt imagine, I got banged up a lot. It wasn't because I was stupid. I was just stubborn and couldn't abide prejudice, bigotry or social injustice.

But over time I sought refuge from the front lines of societal conflicts and worked behind the barricades. I moved myself closer to the liberal base and stronghold. Working in academia and psychology was great. Met wonderful people too (like Kathleen). They were kind to me. They seemed to have compassion for my pain and suffering but let me work out my issues in my own way and in my own time. I worked in psychology for twenty years doing research and administration. It wasn't my first choice. Quite frankly, it wasn't even on the list. But now in hindsight, I see that it saved me from a life of pain and frustration, which I surely would have had if I had pursued a career in Hollywood. I'm glad I didn't go that way. My fork in the road led me to psychology and its rewards.

So now I'm making another transition to the life of a retiree. What do you do, people still ask. I write. Everyday. And trust me...staying open to inspiration and imagination whether it be big or something tiny, is a challenge. So now my vibe is a little more bluish and a little less reddish than a few years ago.

So, do tell. How has your vibe changed over time? I'm interested in your story too. Feel free to leave a comment.